Gorby scratches an unthinkable whopper! Holt 150 ton Field Monitor - 1915.
Kommentarer

Thank's for the interest mates. 👍
As always, I'm struggling to keep the WIP in step with the actual build. I started hacking plastic a couple of weeks ago and have a reasonably presentable body (I'm talking about the monitor, my body is far from presentable); most of a wheel; and I'm currently figuring out how to do the main bangy bits ( I was tempted to say that I've got the main weapon in hand, but thought that may be open to confusion). Feel free to talk amongst yourselves or go to the bar for a top-up, the next update will be along when I can me arse into gear.

I'm not sure fiddling with your bangy bits is much better than having your main weapon in hand.

if Gorby is keeping the pics to himself does that make it his private parts he is playing with?

Bonkers project and dirtbag commentary, what's not to like about this thread?!!?

Not sure what a 'dirtbag commentary' is but I'll take it as a compliment (even if it isn't). 😄
Nice to see so much interest, hopefully it'll survive the next instalment which is….. Now.
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3601570

😄 Gorby I almost spit out my water! Brilliant work and fantastic log as always.

@gorby - You are correct sir, in Oz being called a dirtbag is in fact high praise. Paul gets it!
BTW: it is clear from your pythonesque writing style that your creativity & ingenuity extends far beyond your obvious scratch building skills. Well played!

Utterly incredible! Looks a bit like the Krupp Räumer, but stranger. I'm in 🙂

@Jay Whenever I read Gorby's posts the voice in my head sounds like John Cleese.

Paul: Water! Alcohol may help you get thought my posts easier. I'm happy to sound like John Cleese. Obviously I sound much younger and better looking, but much poorer.
Matthew Stec: I think one of us is confused – it's normally me that's confused, but now I'm confused about who is confused.
Jay: Talents? I have talents? I'll have to tell Mrs Gorby. 🙂
Glad to know about the dirtbag thing, I was beginning to wonder if you're commenting on how often I take a shower.😉
Thanks everyone – really made my day reading your comments – what an utterly spiffing site this is. (Please Note: 'utterly spiffing' is something I would never say, but feel that a younger better looking John Cleese might). 👍

Sod it, it's not my usual thing, but I'm in for the craic! Can't have a fellow Brit outmanned.

I know you're having difficulty getting my whopper out of your thoughts. The third volume in this epic tale is available here:
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3608983

Great progress Gorb. I was wondering how were you going to do the wheels ( and I got the answer). Are you going to scratch the other 3 as well?

Thanks Alex. Only done one wheel so far just to get the method right. They're simple to do, but a little dull. Perhaps I'll save the others for when I get bored if the virus won't let us go out.

Yes but what they produce is two dimensional.
You can buy a pen that is a hand held three dimensional printer.
I'm getting one when I get paid next week.
I figure a hand held three dimensional printer is going to revolutionise our hobby

Sorry Wilky, I was joking. I've seen those before, but when I looked at them they seemed to make more of a goopy mess than anything else. I'm sure they've come a ways since I last checked them out though! Good luck with it.
You'll have to report back and let us know how it works!

I wonder if 3d printer put some model companies out of business?
What is a good printer under 1000 usd?

Thanks for the comment mates – I needed a bit of cheering up. 👍
Wilky: Those 3D are really cool. I haven't really considered them for scratch building, but I might have another a look to see if they would be of use. As Paul says, let us know what they are like. 👍
Matthew: 3D printers are going to completely change out hobby – and probably sooner than we expect. I know a few modellers with printers from Anycubic and Elegoo Mars and the results I've seen are remarkable. Those printers are well under $1,000. It's certainly worth looking into – I'm very tempted myself. Obviously If you want to design your own parts, You'll need to get to grips with the design software.
Scratch-building is sooo last year, what a dinosaur I am.

A 3D pen can be bought for 30AUD which is like two pence.
I saw a video on YouTube where a guy made a motorcycle.
Like anything the skills of the user determine the outcome

Paul, no need to apologise. I do understand humour.
Best thing about the pens is you don't need a computer.
I'm on a very low income.
I don't have a computer.
A thousand dollars is a shit tonne of money to me.
From what I saw on the video.
Things like the tubular framework for an aircraft would be able to be made without the hassles of stretching sprue and gluing.
The guy that made the motorcycle had some killer skills but it only takes practice to get skills

A somewhat strange vehicle i dindt know so far...i am in!!! You finally got me with your building report on britmodeler!!

Thanks mates for sticking with me on this.
Next update is here:
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3614780

Love the anti-viral tips Gorby. What about loading up the ol' airbrush with some booze and just inhaling?

So what's a good price for a 3d? Every time I look there always over 2k.

Paul: 😄 Greta idea, although I may need to upgrade the capacity of my paint cup to about one pint. 🙂
Matthew: If I decided to get one (unlikely at the moment) I'd probably go for the Elegoo Mars Pro and that well under £1,000. There is a review here:
Youtube Video


Great thanks!! I guess I should not shop in the micro mark catalog.

It's almost as if you lot aren't taking my life preserving suggestions seriously. I would add a sad emojiwhatsit, shaking it's head head in dismay, but for some reason there isn't one available - I'll have to write a letter (I'm not sure what about, but I've got some words that are nearing their use-by dates). You'll just have to imagine me shaking my head sadly. If your having trouble picturing me then you should substitute a younger, better looking John Cleese, or a younger, much, much better looking Pierce Brosnan. Although they look nothing like me (as I'm younger and much better looking) they are vaguely human shaped.

If I'am just a figment of your imigination, can you please relocate me and my wife to a villa by the sea? This corona stuff is getting old so if you could pleasae abort 2020 and fast forward to 2021 that would be great! I figured gorbygoulds were a species that looks like slartibartfast, but I will take your word for it. Maybe a yeti will one day surface with a picture of you in his wallet. Nice landship thingie by the way

😄
I'll have a word with admin and get you moved to a nice place by the Barents sea. You might need to stock up on warm clothing.
Slartibartfast is the one with the beard and questionable personal habits.
Sorry about 2020, but when I saw it labelled 'Year of the Bat', I thought it was just because it was made in China.

Warning: Any modellers with a healthy interest in modelling should ignore this next update due to it not have anything to do with modelling:
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3625840
I may have accidentally mentioned modelling in this update, but I promise it won't happen again:
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3625858

Update time. I even managed to mention how the build is going (in passing).
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3638621

What an update! And you even managed to sprinkle in a bit about modeling... 😄 😄 😄
Seriously, looking awesome. One of a kind for sure, again 👍

Lol, even I had a read and a chuckle. I can only think what our foreign mates think of that? Being a middle aged Brit, I can relate to all of it. Thanks for the light hearted read Gorby mate. Keep safe and keep chirpy, old chap. Tally Ho!

Thanks maties. 👍
Alec: Yes I momentary slipped up and accidentally mentioned modelling. Must make sure it doesn't happen again.
Paul: The best way to get a signed copy of my book is as follows:
Write a book (a really good one) sign it 'Gorby' in the style of a younger, much better looking John Cleese and then send a blank cheque to the worthwhile charity 'Save the Gorby ('s only chance to ever get a yacht) Fund'. I would very much like your autograph – it'd look very nice in the bottom right hand corner of the cheque. 🙂
Bozzer:
Chirpy!??!
Chirpy!!!!!
I've a good mind (although that's a debatable point) to sue! I'll have you know I'm as grumpy as most Brits when they get to that special age were they are as miserable and annoying as at any previous point in their lives. Fortunately I have a very poor memory so I've no idea why you needed directions to Hull in the first place. Errrm?

We definitely need more updates like these 😄
The Punctuation Interpol can be tricked very easily, you have to call it poetry and ...
... mission accomplished😉

This update is a bit of a loooong one. Just as well the lockdown has been extend, it'll give you time to read it: 😉
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3652340

Gorby, I totally identify with ordering something from china, waiting a month, and then being too afraid to touch the package for a week or more.

Primo: it's not long. 2nd primo: I wish the English coursebooks were written this way 👍

Anyone clinging to the outdated notion that Brits have a stiff upper lip is advised to read Gorby's build log. I just hope Mrs. Gorby doesn't... 😄 😄 😄

😄 😄 😄
The slightly worrying thing is that I'm considered 'normal' in Britland.
Alec: I'll have you know the Perfect Plastic Putty lip filler has given me a very stiff upper lip. (That's what it's for isn't it?). 🙂
Mrs Gorby is used to me now, although with my sense of humour I pretty much live in the dog house.

I know I've been a stranger in these here parts recently. I've been hard at work at the word-face in the waffle factory and dealing with those dreaded 'other jobs' that we are often threatened with. But I've not busy enough to allow you to escape the next update:
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3671315

I can only guess at how much time you spend composing your narrative. If this all comes naturally, you have definitely missed your life's calling...
The build looks super. I love the wheels 👍

Thanks muchly matiepoos. 👍
Alec: I heard it calling, but I thought it was a wrong number. My writing to modelling ratio is probably in the region of 10:1. If it wasn't for the drivel I could have a whole flock of whoppers by now.
Michael: I'm not in your league yet with the scratch-building, but maybe one day if I try harder I might… who am I kidding.😉

"I heard it calling, but I thought it was a wrong number." that made me laugh out hard 🙂 🙂
On a side note: your double-sides sticky-tape-sheet combo is so simple and brilliant (could have me time and nerves in my past 😉)

I am always pleased if anyone builds something that no other had ever done before...as to say out of nothing into something totally new. And the art is to find ways how to build that things...As i say: You have to make the plastic behave as you want it to do...really great work!!!

Blimey, I feel like I can go straight for CPE exam once your project is completed 😄

😄 😄 😄
Just a word of caution. If you use my style of English in the exam, don't be too surprised if men in white coats put you into a padded room.
Perhaps you'll get the room next to mine.😉

And with that hope I'm gonna ask the British Council to attend it as asap as possible😉

I never understood, why the rest of the world, wants to come to England? There's only us that drinks real beer and everyone else drinks fizzy lager? Our women beat their men, our cows are skinny and it's grey and rainy, all the time! Maybe it's our Humbrol Paint? Save yourself the journey, you can have it. We prefer Tamiya and much better, lol.

I can't explain it aside from the sound of language, it's just the way you feel there (e.g. "the left side is the right side!" 😄 ), even though everything Bozzer mentioned is absolutely true.
What's more - once all that mad virus episode is finished I wanna go there again (even though I'm gonna have to buy a local SIM card this time 🙁 ) as asap as possible. I have a looong bucket list of places I still wanna see there (Scotchland and Ireland included).
PS. Humbrol addiction may have something to do with it, as I inhale it on moreless regular basis since the age of 6 approximately😉

Spanjaard, I am Belgian, but I loooove a good pint of bitter and my watering hole here in Brussels is the Churchill, an English pub serving bottled British ales. Am I a traitor?😉

I'm totally confused now. Which is pretty normal, so all is well with the world (if you ignore the virus that is….. and the locusts…. and the forest fires…. and the screwed economy…. and … Okay forget I said that).
All I know is that Bughunter has excellent taste in wheels, Bilbo has excellent taste in beer and Lukasz's English is probably better than mine.
I'll go back to sleep now.

Cheers! And cheers to your very numerous rivets too! Did you manage to count them? B)

You forgot to mention that Daniel Klink has excellent taste in Single Malt and beautiful Landscapes..🙂
Cheers..
PS: like your wheels too..Great project and workmanship at all so far

ha haha, no René, certainly not 🙂 like many things in life, it is a question of preference. everybody has his/hers 🙂 and most of us will agree... that is build is fantastic 🙂

It appears that not even a minor dose of the plague of battyness can stop the whopper's progress, and as it's been along time since I last annoyed you, it's a double helping:
This word-dump has been rated as 0.9% modelling related. Avoid at all costs.
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3699798
This one actually mentions that I'm building a model!
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3699817

a bit short after such a long hiatus 😄 (top tip:If you can still remember Alzheimer's first name you have nothing to fear from dementia😉 )

Great to hear that you have recovered, and back to entertaining us with your wit 👍. Oh yeah, the build is pretty cool also 😄

The smokestacks would have to be vertical - you need a draft to draw the air through the tubes in the boiler. Source: I've worked on train locomotives at a museum.

Thanks very much matiepoos. 🙂 👍
Ben: I thought that until I saw this:
douglas-self.com/MUS..mney/chimney.htm#stl
Pay particular attention to the 'stealth chimneys' - yes there is such a thing, I'm not making it up!

Another Scratch Builder! Awesome Me Son! Looks Great! Thanks for Sharing.

Yep - familiar with this. I'm in Colorado and here we tried to use the "bear trap" stack, which I see is represented on the page. It didn't work well 🙂

Really like that steel monster gorby.
Would love to make a trip to one of Trumps Golf Courses with one of these 🙂

This is totally ridiculous !!
But I really love it !! 😄 😄 😄
Is this a fictional beast or did someone actually conceive of this back in 1915 ?

😄 😄 😄
Thanks mates. 👍
Ben: Are you suggesting that the rest of the machine is well thought out???!!! If so you may need to make an appointment with your usual brain doctor😉
Daniel: 😄 😄 😄 Finally, we've found a reason to build some. Shall we put in an order for four dozen?

yap, i'll take six in a first step...🙂
2 for Trump - 2 for Bolsonaro and another two for Jinping 🙂
Earth saved ...

Sounds a bit idealistic to me Dan😉
Remember, idealism costs lives !! 😄

Gorby as long as the golf course is destroyed, of course it's well thought out!

er no Dan, Stalin, Lenin, Trotsky, Marx, Mao, Pol Pot, Moo Ham Mad, Ceaser, Genghis Khan and Hitler were all idealists whose idealism ended up costing a lot of people their lives .....😉
But whatever dude, perhaps we should all stay away from politics here on Scalemates, perhaps ?
Less arguments that way . . . Maybe ? 😄 😄 😄

Haha, quite so Playtime222, there's nothing quite like a good old fashioned boob fight !! 😄 😄 😄

Sorry playtime, the only boobs your likely to see here, are my attempts at historical accuracy.😉

@choppa you are right... but it seemscoming to late anyway.
My thoughts are with you.. Your country seems closer to the edge as it has ever been.

Yeah seems like the whole world is teetering on a pin head given current events !
But at least we can have some escape here on scalemates 🙂 😄

The end is nigh!
The final whopper build report has at last arrived (and be warned: it's a bit of a whopper itself):
britmodeller.com/for..&comment=3722661

Very cool gorby...
Perfect machine and true workmanship ..wow.👍
I'll take ten of them 🙂

👍
Ten? Okay I'll get started straight away. I hope you're rich. Very, very rich.
(you'll be significant less rich when you get the bill.)😉

Very nice work far off the beaten track! This monster is a real eyecatcher!

Picture n°24 is the most impressive of them all... Congrats!!! 👍👍👍

Remember its not the size its what you do with it.maybe not in this case LOL.

I just realized the early 1900's US 6" shell I use as a doorstop would have been the sort of ammunition this beast consumed.

Here's a picture of what the main guns in the whopper would fire. It's about 2' tall, 6" in diameter. ipernity.com/doc/bro/50016194

This is really hell of a monster!! Nice work, i wa in since getting strated, and loved every single step of this monster being created...
Thank you for showing, there is more out there than we believe...maybe i can find a new "monster" to scratch, my believes are going up...as i didn´t know this "monitor"...
REALLY GREAT!!!!

Awesome result! I suppose the guy with the binoculars may be afraid of heights, since he would have a better view from atop this Land Battleship

Mexico built a heavy tank in this era, one that actually got off the drawing board: tanks-encyclopedia.c..mexico-tnca-salinas/

Thanks very much mates. 🙂
Ben: I knew the shell would be big but, WOW! Building the whopper has made me wonder how it would be operated and I assume the armoury storing the shells would be either be below the big guns or just behind. Therefore I should imagine that they had intended to put a hatch directly under the storage area so the shells could be winched directly in. Your photo has shown that they would be much too heavy to man-handle through the main hatch.
I haven't seen that Mexican one before – oh no, it's giving me thoughts…. 🙁
Michael: As soon as I saw it I knew it had to be built. Mind you there is another monster I'd also like to build… but it's even bigger!
tanks-encyclopedia.c..american-prototypes/
Dave: Bloke with the binocs was intended to be stuck on the top – but then I found the dio would be too tall to fit in my storage cupboard, so I've decided that he an officer wondering where the hell he left his whopper.

Gorby: yeah, just the shell is knee high. I do not know if it had bagged charges behind it or a big brass casing. I haven't identified which cannon it's for, but it is a "MODEL 1907" and definitely US Army markings.
I'd love to see the Tanque Salinas vs. 150 ton land monitor battle 🙂

Truly, an achievement. Congrats on this unique and entertaining build Gorby 👍

Thanks very much for commenting mates, I'm pleased you like it. 🙂 👍

Yeah, now we want to see that "Jehlik's Armored Vehicle"...maybe in 1/35?? But 1/48 will also do!! Hit it!!!!

Couldn't find time to read the last chapter till today. I'm afraid all the exclamation wording has already been used and I can only add some doubles here. 😄
No Irishmen here before me? OK, let's have a try then: It's grand Sir, in every aspect and from every angle! 😄

Great job Gorby! I thought the color is a primer, and it will look finally like pic 1. The paint is may be a left over from your Roland?😉 Would be a nice pair together!

😄 😄 😄
Thanks mates for the comments. 👍
Michael: The Jehlik AV is a future possibility, but due to it's size I'm going to have to resort to 1/72!
Frank: The colour is the nearest I could find to WWI battleship grey, but who knows what colour it would really have been - I don't. I've tried persuading Roland to pose with it, but he's just cowering on the shelf and won't go anywhere near the monster.

Now I'd like to see the size of the truck you'd need to take it to the actual battlefield. Didn't this thing have a top speed around 10mph?

I should imagine that if it managed to get to 10mph the designers would have thrown a party to celebrate. If they had ever built any, the more likely outcome would probably be the stripping all the gears in the gearboxes, before it exploded into a million pieces taking a significant part of Texas with it.
Thereby resulting in the score: American industrial ingenuity 0, Mexican donkey 1.😉

A very impressive project mate!
When i see all these comments, it was very well received.
I can understand that, I really like it too👍

Thank you Simon, Robert & Ben. 🙂
I love mechanical oddities as well and I'd also forgotten how many lovely comments this got.

What a strange but cool machine.
Great scratchbuilding work! 👍

😄
Rui: I doubt it would move down hill with the wind behind it. 😄
Thanks all for your nice comments. 🙂
Album info
Let me introduce my entirely 1/48 scratch-built whopper – the Holt 150 ton Field monitor.
During the Mexican boarder war (or was it the Mexican revolution – it's so bloody confusing) the Americans seriously considered building these monstrosities, and arming them with two 6" naval guns. It seems the main reason they decided not to, is because the metal monsters wouldn't be able to keep up with the cavalry horses. There are no contemporary pictures or diagrams and only a pretty confusing written description, from which a modern side view has been cobbled together. My model is mainly (but not slavishly) based on these.
As I said in the WIP, I'm aware the base looks more like Blackpool beach than the Mexican desert and I know it's a bit of a let down that it isn't displayed as a Whopper versus Mexican donkey stare-off, but hope you like it anyway.
Thanks for having a ganders.
This is the work in progress, although at 17,000 words you may need to wait until you retire before you tackle it.
brexitmodeller.com/f..le-whopper/#comments